#129: Role Reversal

[lordchen]

Prompt: #129
Title: Role Reversal
Pairing: Chen-centric, slight!Chen/Chanyeol, slight!Kris/Suho
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Mentions of Kris (I don’t know if this should be a warning or not), one mention of needles.
Word count: 12,150 words
Summary: Jongdae is so used to taking care of others. It’s his turn to be taken care of.

Kim Jongdae. Where do we even start if we want to talk about him?

People would know him as Chen, the main vocalist of EXO and EXO-M. But to the eyes of his members and his fans, he was more than just that.

Kim Jongdae was a hard-worker and a perfectionist. When he had just gotten started on training, he would do his best on vocal and dance training. He was extremely grateful when he was awarded the chance to debut in a band that he wasn’t even supposed to be a part of. This “M1” band was split into M1 and M2 at the last minute, and Jongdae happily chose to be in M2, which was eventually named EXO-M.

Being in EXO-M was an adventure, to say the least. He was surrounded by four Chinese people and one Korean person whom he knew for less than 11 months. When he had to record a song for their (very first!) mini-album, Jongdae struggled with the pronunciation of the Chinese words. He thought he would fare better, since he did learn Mandarin back in junior high school.

The real reason of his perfectionism was actually his personal fear of letting people down. Seeing the look on the producer’s face whenever he messed up a line almost discouraged him. But being discouraged was never in Kim Jongdae’s dictionary. Instead, he asked Yixing – since Luhan was busy teaching Minseok and he was kind of afraid of Yifan and Tao – to teach him the correct pronunciation and never stopped until he got the dimpled smile from the Changsa-born member. He was glad to see not only the producer’s smiling face, but also his fellow members’ faces when he managed to nail the pronunciation and finish recording their song.

(Jongdae still facepalmed whenever he heard his voice saying the first English lines of What is Love, though. He was not very proud of that.)

When it came to shooting the music video for What is Love, Jongdae tried to convey the meaning of the song through his expression, which he actually found quite hard. It was hard for him to concentrate, and as the result, they had to film over and over again because Jongdae couldn’t maintain his laughter. Thank God the music video was a mixture of him and Luhan singing and a compilation of teasers. Eventually they cut the video they shot of Jongdae and Luhan and added more teasers into the video. Jongdae was half-relieved, half-disappointed. He could’ve done much better.

On their debut showcase day, Jongdae was shaking, not only out of nerves, but also excitement. He was about to live his dream. He was about to step onto a stage and sing songs that was made just for his group to a crowd of people who wanted to listen to those songs voluntarily. On the other hand, he was also afraid of messing up on their very first showcase. What if he forgot the lines? What if he messed up the choreography he slaved over for months?

But when he actually stepped on that stage, all those worries were for nothing. There were things that he wished he could change, yes, but all in all, it was better than what he imagined. Since he was rather new, Leeteuk-sunbaenim didn’t ask any questions towards him, only to the members he was quite familiar with such as Joonmyeon and Jongin, – or Suho and Kai, he guessed – but he was fine with it. He wanted to keep the image of a mysterious, “Chinese or Korean” member of EXO-M for a bit longer. And that was how his adventure with this band called EXO really started.

Kim Jongdae was every member’s dongsaeng and hyung at the same time. Being in the middle of the age ladder in EXO, he had his share of hyung-deul and dongsaeng-deul. But he could sometimes be the hyung towards his older members and the dongsaeng towards his younger ones.

In his household, his mother was the only female in the family, so he acted as the daughter-like son, unlike his father and hyung, Jongdeok, who had very manly personalities. Because of this, he grew to become a person who liked to express his feelings through not only his words, but also his actions. He would openly hold his friends’ hands, put his arm around their shoulders, and even give them a big bear hug. Same thing happened with his members.

Skinship was just something so natural to him, and he was glad that none of his members rejected him. He didn’t mind if he was the one who gave or received said skinship. Jongdae would never leave a member hanging if they wanted to get a high-five from him in the middle of a performance. He would silently wipe other members’ sweat out of their faces with a tissue. He would back hug his members whenever he felt like it. He would openly hold his members by the waist whenever he wanted to. He would even sometimes put his hand on someone’s butt just to show some kind of support. The worst he would do was to playfully bite his members.

He loved to pamper his members, especially the younger ones like Tao, Jongin, and Sehun. He would give them the encouragement they needed whenever they looked just a little bit nervous when they were about to go on stage. He would help Tao with his Korean because he stood the closest to him. Sometimes he would feed the members with his own food because he knew they were eyeing his food. He would give other members their mics first before his. For his members, Jongdae could be very selfless.

But in front of his members, be they older or even younger, Jongdae could be a kid. He would whine whenever something didn’t go his way. He would even stomp his feet in frustration. Being the perfectionist that he was, those occasions didn’t happen once or twice; on every rehearsal and training, he would whine at least twice, and stomp his feet at least once.

Jongdae had that natural aegyo in his voice that no one could really deny. Not even the maknae, Sehun. Jongdae would whine once or twice, and Sehun would buy him bubble tea in any flavor he wanted. If even the cold-looking maknae could fall for his aegyo, nothing had to be said about his hyung-deul, especially Joonmyeon.

Jongdae was also very mischievous. He just loved making people laugh. Even though he only knew the members for a shorter period of time than anyone in the group, he would openly make fun of Kyungsoo with Chanyeol and Baekhyun. Being someone with decent people skill, Jongdae made friends quite easily. People knew he was joking, so they only laughed and reprimanded him a couple of times, but they knew never to take his jokes to heart. He, Chanyeol, and Baekhyun were always on the receiving end of Kyungsoo’s headlock or any jujitsu and wrestling technique he didn’t even know Kyungsoo knew.

But despite his bubbly, open, and friendly personality he showed to the world, Jongdae had his own fears and worries.

During trainee times and recordings, Jongdae had to strain his voice in order to reach the notes the teacher or the producer wanted him to reach. Jongdae forced himself to reach that note, not wanting to disappoint anyone – not even himself. But at the same time, he was also worried about damaging his lungs or his vocal cords. Whenever his mother asked him if he was okay, he had to say that he was; he never wanted his mother to worry about him.

He was also worried about not being able to be accepted by the other members, especially Joonmyeon who had gone through 7 years of training. He only had 11 months of training; wouldn’t they think that he didn’t deserve it? Luckily, he had Baekhyun who shared the same worries as he did. But he talked about it with Baekhyun less than Baekhyun talked about this issue with him. He didn’t want Baekhyun to be too worried. Thankfully, the members acted as if they had been friends for a long time, and Jongdae and Baekhyun were relieved.

He was also worried about dragging his teammates down in dance practices. Jongdae would never hesitate to admit that he had two left feet and that he was hopeless in terms of dancing. He caught on quite quickly, and he was good at remembering the steps, but somehow the dance teacher always made him do the dance at least twice before he was satisfied with it. He could also see that the dance teacher sometimes looked frustrated; Jongdae was too. He would then drag Jongin and Yixing to teach him how to move the way the dance teacher wanted him to move, which was not easy.

Because of his personality, Jongdae set aside his worries and decided to just care for his members more than himself.

Having his Minseok-hyung in China with him was comforting. Knowing that he was not the only Korean member in a Chinese sub-group was somewhat a relief. With Minseok there, he wasn’t the only person confused about whatever it was someone was talking or laughing about until the translator finally did their job for the Korean members. They teach each other Mandarin, exercised together, and reminded each other to eat, or not to eat too much.

With Luhan, it was like having a hyung and a dongsaeng. Sometimes he was the manly Luhan, teaching him Mandarin with such patience and willing to protect him in a game in their first appearance on Happy Camp. But sometimes, he was baby Luhan, giving everyone the vibe of needing to be protected, even by Jongdae, who was younger than Luhan. Luhan protesting to his members that he was a real man was always funny to Jongdae, because every time his Beijing-born hyung said that, he always looked like a kid wanting to be called an adult.

Jongdae was particularly close to his Joonmyeon-hyung. Because Joonmyeon was the leader, Jongdae looked up to him very much. Jongdae shook his head in amazement every time he handled the mischief he, Chanyeol, and Baekhyun caused with incredible patience. No matter how much Jongdae made fun of Joonmyeon, he wouldn’t hesitate to say that he was very proud to have Joonmyeon as his leader.

Yixing was one of those people Jongdae really appreciated having in his life. Never in his life had he encountered someone so kind and talented. Yixing was just like his symbol, the unicorn; he was out of this world. Not once or twice did Jongdae gape at Yixing’s talent when he heard Yixing play the acoustic or piano version of their faster songs. Yixing would help his dongsaeng-deul or hyung-deul first before helping himself. In return, Jongdae would ask Yixing not to push himself when his waist started to hurt and remind him to eat.

Baekhyun was a very dear friend. They came to the company at the very same time, and wished each other luck when they got in. The second Jongdae heard that they were going to be put in the same group, Jongdae was ecstatic. During training, they would praise and critique each other’s singing techniques and teach each other. This habit continued until they debuted.

Chanyeol was the very definition of a puppy. He was very active, very loud, and very friendly. The first time Jongdae and Baekhyun entered the practice room that was filled with future members of EXO, they were worried that the other members would not accept them. Imagine their relief when Chanyeol, in his quite intimidating height, – but not as intimidating as Yifan – approached them with a big smile and such a deep voice, asking them various random things to make them relax.

Jongdae had always thought that Kyungsoo was really cute. His eyes were not very big, but the white part of his eyes really dominated his eyeballs, so he looked like a deer in the headlights pretty much every time. The beagles had made it their mission in the pre-debut days to see how big Kyungsoo’s eyes could get. They knew that Kyungsoo was not exactly amused at what they were doing; what they didn’t know was that Kyungsoo could kick ass, literally. They immediately found out that Kyungsoo’s eyes widened when he was starting to get nervous, so Jongdae would try and make Kyungsoo laugh – or mad – for him to relax a little bit.

The maknae line – Jongin, Tao, and Sehun – was definitely the hardest to approach, even for Jongdae who really liked to make friends. All three of them had very intimidating looks which made them somewhat unapproachable. They would latch onto different people, – Jongin with Joonmyeon, Tao with Yifan, and Sehun with Luhan – but not Jongdae. They only started to warm up to Jongdae after he bought them bubble tea and went cycling with them, just the four of them. He found out overtime that the three kids were just that, kids. Jongdae really enjoyed pampering, spoiling, and even annoying them once in a while.

Yifan was also someone that was quite hard to approach, with his intimidating height, looks, and aura. But after he decided to join the M2 sub-group and Yifan was appointed leader, Jongdae could see the real, silly side of this Chinese-Canadian man. He would act like he was the coolest in the world even though he was actually making a big fool out of himself. He was someone that Jongdae really looked up to and trusted.

But that trust was broken when Yifan suddenly left them without a word.

Jongdae could see how the lawsuit broke some of the members, particularly Tao and Joonmyeon, and Jongdae wanted to be mad at his hyung for breaking them like that. The leader Jongdae saw as someone who was the strongest and toughest in the group, his Joonmyeon-hyung, broke down in tears the second he arrived at the dorm after receiving their first award for Overdose from M! Countdown. It was a sight that Jongdae would rather not see again. Seeing Tao cry was something Jongdae was quite used to, but the silent Tao that came after he was tired of crying was not. Even Chanyeol, the happy virus Chanyeol, was crying silently as he comforted Joonmyeon.

Jongdae wanted to yell at Yifan for leaving. But at the same time, he couldn’t. Because he really loved Yifan as a hyung and a leader, and he wanted Yifan to be happy. Jongdae even blamed himself for not knowing that his leader was unhappy in the group. He was naïve for thinking that everything was fine, when for Yifan, it was actually not. He should’ve known better.

So that night when they found out about the lawsuit, with Tao asleep in his arms, Jongdae wept.

He cried in anger at his hyung for leaving without saying anything. He cried because he was already so tired of practicing for the concert, and now everything had to be redone from scratch to cover the missing person in the line-up. He cried out of frustration, because he should’ve seen the signs of Yifan’s unhappiness, if there were any. He cried because his group was losing a member, and it felt like losing a limb. It would always feel like something was missing, and from Jongdae’s knowledge, that something was never coming back. Yifan was never coming back.

The atmosphere in the dorm changed. Jongdae tried his best to help Joonmyeon whenever he needed something. He even asked Baekhyun, Chanyeol, Jongin, and Sehun to tone down the mischief because he felt like Joonmyeon needed more time to rest than any of them right now. He would remind Minseok, Luhan, Jongin, and Yixing, who became more immersed in practicing and exercising, to eat and get some rest. He would also take over the kitchen whenever he felt like Kyungsoo was about to faint from fatigue after the practice, no matter how tired he himself was.

Jongdae felt that he had to help everyone. Including Yifan.

Two days before the first date of their first solo concert, Jongdae gathered his courage to call Yifan and was pleasantly surprised that Yifan accepted his call after only reaching the voicemail two calls before that. He asked Yifan how he was, and how he was feeling. He told Yifan to get some rest, eat well, and not worry about the group. He updated Yifan on how everyone was faring, and how the concert preparation was going, even though Yifan didn’t ask them. He even gave Yifan a piece of his mind about Yifan’s actions, and how he was mad and disappointed, yet he was sorry for not noticing anything wrong.

But that was just Kim Jongdae for you. He was a hard-working perfectionist who would kick your ass if you even dare say one bad word about his friends and family. He would put someone else first, and himself second. He would try to understand someone from their perspective and not judge their decisions. He was open-minded enough to actually forgive someone who had hurt his loved ones.

Jongdae sometimes even wondered if he was too kind for his own good and if his sacrifices would bite him in the ass one day.

***

When Jongdae woke up for another practice session in SM Building in his bed, he knew something was off. When he sat up, his vision was spinning. He squeezed his eyes and rubbed them before opening them again. Nothing changed. His head was still pounding and the room wouldn’t stop spinning. But Jongdae’s job didn’t allow him to take a day off whenever he pleased. He needed to get up and get to practicing for their next concert date.

Jongdae walked towards the bathroom and took a shower while holding the wall because if he didn’t, he was sure that he was going to fall down. After his shower, he walked with his members to the van and slept all the way to the SM Building. If Tao didn’t wake him up, he would very well sleep all through the day in the car. But he couldn’t afford a good sleep. He needed to get to work.

Jongdae changed into a pair of training shorts and joined Minseok and Yixing in stretching. He acted as if he wasn’t about to faint. They couldn’t afford any more setbacks. They started practicing from the intro, then MAMA. As they were practicing Moonlight, Jongdae couldn’t hold it in anymore. He gave in to the temptation of darkness and fell down. He could hear a couple of familiar voices of his members and Tony Testa, but that was it.

By the time he woke up, he was in an unfamiliar room with strong scent of cleanliness. He must be in a hospital. He looked around the room and finally met the worried eyes of Yixing’s. The guilt came like a storm.

“Jongdae-yah!” Yixing said with his accented Korean that Jongdae found very adorable. At the call of Jongdae’s name, everyone started gathering around Jongdae with concerned eyes. The guilt multiplied.

“Where am I…?”

“You’re at the hospital. We can’t get you to the dorms because the front and back door of the company is filled with fans. Youngmin-hyung doesn’t wanna take risks of them following us back,” Minseok explained.

“Youngmin-hyung’s calling the doctor right now,” Kyungsoo said.

Five minutes later, Youngmin came in with a doctor.

“Jongdae-sshi, welcome back to the land of the living!” Jongdae decided he liked the doctor already, “How are you feeling?”

“…dizzy?”

“That’s normal for someone who had just fainted. Well, Jongdae-sshi, looks like you’re running a pretty high fever and a case of malnourishment. I know that you’re a very busy idol, but please remember to take care of yourself. Eat when it’s time. Even though you’re not hungry, you still have to eat, no matter how little. But when you are hungry, eat enough nutritious food. You can’t depend on supplements forever. Don’t forget to rest whenever you feel too tired. Especially when you’re a singer. I assume you know that when you don’t get enough sleep, your vocal cords won’t open. We’ve hooked you up on an IV to get some nutrients into you, but I would prefer not seeing you in here to get dripped up again, Jongdae-sshi,” the doctor said. Jongdae could only nod. The doctor smiled at him and bowed to everyone before leaving.

Jongdae braced himself. He knew he was in trouble.

“Kim Jongdae.”

Jongdae tried not to look at the leader in the eyes. In the corner of his eyes, he thought he saw Tao crying.

“What were you thinking? I thought when you said you were full, you were full! How could you be malnourished if you were full? And now you’re running a fever! Why didn’t you say anything when you’re tired?"

Jongdae wanted to look the way that Joonmyeon wasn’t in. But when he did, he saw not only Tao, but all three maknae-deul sobbing silently. That sight made him even guiltier.

“…I’m sorry hyung… I’ve held us up…”

“I’m not worried about that, Jongdae-yah. You’re sick; that’s what I’m worried about. You’re sick because apparently you care too much for us and we didn’t care for you enough.”

Finally Jongdae looked towards his hyung and shook his head violently, resulting in a headache. Jongdae held his head.

“It’s not like that! You guys care for me enough!”

“No, we don’t,” Yixing said, “You put yourself before us, and look what happened. Just rest and let us care for you for a change.”

“But…”

“No buts. Just yours on that bed,” Minseok started, “from tomorrow until you’re discharged, we’re gonna take turns taking care of you for half a day. Youngmin-hyung and the other managers already agreed to it.”

“I’ll tell Tony and the higher-ups. You just get some rest until you’re back up again,” said Youngmin.

Jongdae supposed he could do nothing to convince his members otherwise, so he just nodded.

***

Day 1 – Morning: Minseok

When he woke up the next day, Minseok was already sitting beside him, focused on his tablet.

“…hyung…?” Jongdae called out in a hoarse voice.

“Jongdae-yah, you’re up? Wanna wash your face?” Minseok asked as he put his tablet into his backpack. Jongdae nodded and sat up slowly. Minseok was immediately by his side and walked him towards the bathroom. Minseok then closed the door and let Jongdae do his business in the bathroom. After Jongdae was done, Minseok walked him back to the bed and sat beside him again.

“So what are we doing today, hyung?” Jongdae asked in a more coherent tone.

“First you should eat your breakfast, and then take your medicines,” Minseok said as he took a bowl of what looked like porridge from a tray that Jongdae didn’t notice was there before. Jongdae reached out a hand to take the bowl, but Minseok pulled away and shook his head while saying, “Uh-uh.”

“But hyuuung…”

“I’m taking care of you now, Jongdae-yah. Sit still and eat,” Minseok said as he pushed a button on the bed controller to make Jongdae sit up. Jongdae pouted as Minseok spooned the porridge and blew it to cool it down a little bit. After he deemed it cool enough, Minseok moved the spoon closer to Jongdae’s mouth. Jongdae rolled his eyes but he let the spoon through into his mouth anyway. Minseok smiled and took another spoonful of porridge and repeated the process until Jongdae refused to open his mouth.

“No more, hyung…”

“Jongdae-yah…”

“It’s tasteless. And it feels weird when it goes down my throat…”

Minseok sighed, “Fine,” he said as he put the bowl back onto the tray and took his tablet from his backpack, “the website’s filled with messages from fans, you wanna read some?”

“Sure,” Jongdae said with a smile as he scooted over to give Minseok some space to sit on. Minseok stood up and sat on the bed beside Jongdae and they scanned the tablet together. Jongdae laughed at a couple of the messages with Minseok. It felt good to see that a lot of the fans were giving him get well soon wishes, but he didn’t want the fans to worry. He borrowed his hyung’s tablet and logged onto the website and posted a log saying that he was thankful of the well wishes, he was fine, and he would try his best to recover as fast as he could, so the fans shouldn’t worry about him.

“Were there a lot of fans outside the building when I fainted, hyung?”

“Well, I’ve seen a lot of pictures of Chanyeol carrying you to the car from the building, so I assume yes. I wasn’t really paying attention.”

“C-Chanyeol?”

Minseok smirked, “Yeah, Chanyeol.”

Jongdae mentally slapped his head. He forgot that the eldest knew about his (not so) itty-bitty-teeny-tiny-little crush on Chanyeol.

Minseok beamed and pinched Jongdae’s cheeks, “Aigoo, my dongsaeng is so cute!”

“Hyuuung!”

Minseok laughed, but then his laugh turned into a small, sad smile, “But you honestly gave all of us a heart attack, Jongdae-yah.”

“…”

“I couldn’t even describe how it was, seeing you fall like you did.”

Jongdae looked down to his lap, “…I’m sorry, hyung…”

“I know you love helping and caring for others, but you can’t forget about taking care of yourself, Jongdae-ah. It’s okay to be selfish for once in a while. You’ve been taking care of us as much as Joonmyeon and even Yifan did for us. Let us pay our debts.”

“There’s no debt to be paid, I did all of that on my own will…”

“And we’re doing this out of our own wills. So just lie down, and enjoy it. Well, as much as you can in a hospital bed.”

***

Day 1 – Evening: Luhan

At 6 PM sharp, a knock was heard from the door. Jongdae was sitting up on his bed, watching TV while Minseok packed his bags to get ready to change with another member.

“Ah, that must be Luhan! Luhan-ah, come in!” Minseok called out.

In came Luhan with his own bag, carrying a small pillow. Luhan smiled at Jongdae and Jongdae smiled back.

“Ready to spend the night with me, Jongdae-yah?”

“It’s not like I have a choice, right, hyung?” Luhan laughed and high-fived Minseok, as if Minseok was passing the baton to Luhan.

“I’m leaving, Jongdae-yah. Get well soon, alright?” Minseok said.

“Yes, hyung. Get home safely.”

Minseok waved at Jongdae and Jongdae waved back. Then Jongdae was left in the room with Luhan.

“You know, you were the last person I thought of to actually faint in a rehearsal. I thought Yixing was going to be first, considering how little he eats real food,” Luhan said as he sat on the chair beside Jongdae’s bed and set his bag aside.

“Yeah, but Yixing-hyung eats snacks a lot. I told him it’s an unhealthy lifestyle, but apparently I have unhealthier lifestyle than he does. At least he eats.”

“Something you should probably learn from him. Other than dancing.”

“Hyuuung!” Jongdae whined. Luhan laughed.

“I’m just kidding. You dance just fine. I think you’ve improved a lot since we debuted.”

“Thanks, hyung,” Jongdae smiled. Luhan laughed as he shook his head.

“So what did you do with Minseok?”

“He babied me. He fed me my breakfast and lunch, and then we read some fan messages on the website… all that stuff.”

“Should I do the same?”

“Please don’t. It was super weird,” Jongdae said with a serious face. Luhan laughed at that.

“Okay, I won’t. To be honest, I really didn’t know what to do when Joonmyeon said that ‘we should take care of Jongdae.’ I mean, from what I’ve seen, you seemed like you could take care of yourself just fine. But apparently I was wrong, because you came to the point where you fainted,” Luhan said, ruffling Jongdae’s hair, “Don’t do that again, Jongdae-yah, you’ve made us all worried.”

Jongdae looked down to his lap, “…I’m sorry, hyung.”

“Well, what’s done is done. All you can do now is get healthy and not faint again in a rehearsal. Okay?”

Jongdae smiled and nodded, “Okay, hyung,” Luhan smiled back, “By the way, hyung. What’s with the pillow?”

“Oh, that? You know I need to have something familiar to sleep with! I even brought my own blanket!”

Jongdae shook his head, “You’re worst than Sehun, hyung.”

“Hey, at least I don’t need some stuffed animals to sleep with. Speaking of stuffed animals… I know that you can sleep better with these guys,” Luhan took his bag and rummaged in it until his eyes lit up and he pulled out two teddy bears from his bag. Jongdae beamed.

“My bears!” Jongdae squealed as he extended his hands and made grabby motions with his hands, “Gimme!”

Luhan laughed, “Okay, okay…” he said as he handed Jongdae both bears. Jongdae held the bears and squeezed them tight to his chest with a big smile on his face. He was going to have better sleep tonight, “I keep wondering why you never told us their names,” Luhan suddenly said.

Jongdae froze. Luhan raised an eyebrow.

“Uh… well… it’s kinda embarrassing.”

“Why? It’s not like you named one of them after Chanyeol, right?” Luhan asked with a chuckle as he stood up and approached the small coffee maker that Minseok left. When Jongdae didn’t give him an answer, Luhan looked back at Jongdae, “Right?”

“Uh…”

“Oh. My. God. Kim Jongdae, you are so cheesy.”

“It’s not like I named it ‘Chanyeol’, okay!"

“What are their names, then?” Luhan asked with a smirk as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

Jongdae looked down at his bears. He lifted one with the Rolling Stones mini t-shirt on and said, “Dobi,” and he lifted the other one with the Growl uniform on and said, “Captain Beagle,” with his head still looking at his lap. He heard Luhan giggle.

“Jongdae-yah, you are so screwed.”

Jongdae smiled softly at his bears, “I know, right?”

Luhan smiled at his dongsaeng. He looked around the room and saw a tray of food, untouched, and said, “Eat your dinner, Jongdae-yah. And then drink your medicines.”

“But… it doesn’t taste any good.”

“Tough. Unless you want me to feed you.”

“No!”

“Well, eat then!” Luhan said as he put his cup down beside the coffee maker. He rolled the small table that had the tray on top of it towards Jongdae, “If you wanna get out of here sooner, you have to eat. Now eat.”

“I’ll take it back. I kinda like being babied.”

“Well, you’re not gonna get that from me. Eat.”

***

Day 2 – Morning: Joonmyeon and ???

When Jongdae woke up the next morning, nobody was there for him like Minseok was yesterday. Jongdae didn’t mind that, though. He was babied enough by Minseok yesterday and it felt nice, but at the same time, it felt kind of weird. He wasn’t used to being babied by his members.

Luhan was nowhere to be found. Neither was his pillow. Jongdae’s teddy bears were still there, though.

Jongdae looked around the room and smiled when he saw his phone on the side table. He unlocked the phone and saw that he had a couple of new messages. Since he needed something to do to pass the time, he decided why not.

There was a message from Luhan saying sorry that he couldn’t be there when he woke up, and telling him to eat his breakfast and take his medicines. Suddenly his phone went off because of a new message, and Jongdae’s eyes widened when he saw the name of the sender.

Yifan.

Chengzi, I heard you're sick. I know you like taking care of people, but don’t forget to take care of yourself. Get well soon, Chen-Chen. Hyung loves you :)

The message was longer than Jongdae was used to when it came to Yifan. The words were a little bit awkward, – maybe Yifan hadn’t been using Korean for a while – but it’s the thought that counted, he guessed.

Jongdae decided not to reply to the message. For one, he didn’t know what to say, and two, he didn’t know if Yifan was busy or not. Or where he was in this world, for that matter.

Jongdae decided to do an internet search on Naver, but paused for a bit. Should he search Naver or Weibo? He didn’t want to risk seeing the horrible keywords that would come up the second he put ‘Kris’ on the search bar. But when he did go to Naver and put ‘Kris’ on the search bar, he thanked God that Kris was quite a common name for foreign stars, because he only saw names in the suggested keywords.

After one month of not seeing each other, it was weird to see Yifan’s jacket photo in Yifan’s profile in Naver. His eyes widened as he saw what was on the news segment. There were a couple of new photos of Yifan, in a suit with a couple of people in formalwear. “Somewhere Only We Know,” it said. So the rumors of Yifan getting a role in a movie were true, then. Jongdae wanted to congratulate him, but he didn’t know if it would be awkward or not, so he decided not to.

“Jongdae-yah, you’re awake?”

Jongdae looked up from his phone and saw Joonmyeon walking through the door of his room. Jongdae became nervous. Before he read the message from Yifan and read the news about Yifan, Jongdae wouldn’t mind having Joonmyeon to accompany him. But now that he had read the message and seen the news, Joonmyeon was the last person he wanted to see.

“What are you doing?” Joonmyeon asked as he put his bag down and sat beside Jongdae, trying to peek at Jongdae’s phone. Jongdae tried to put the phone down and hid the screen before Joonmyeon could see what he was seeing, but judging from the look on Joonmyeon’s face, he had seen it.

“Was that… Yifan?”

Jongdae knew the relationship between the two leaders didn’t stop at just co-leaders and fellow members. During his trainee days, Jongdae could tell that there was something more than platonic happening between the two of them, even in his short period of knowing them. When they parted as EXO-K and EXO-M, Jongdae was the one Yifan would go to when he missed Joonmyeon. It was annoying, yet cute.

When they became EXO as a whole again, Jongdae could see the difference in Yifan and Joonmyeon’s faces. They were brighter, they smiled a lot more, and they had more skinship than they usually did. Jongdae could also tell that the lawsuit broke the two of them. He saw how Joonmyeon cried. He heard how Yifan sobbed and apologized multiple times as Jongdae gave his hyung a piece of his mind.

“…yeah. I think he’s filming a movie right now,” Jongdae said carefully.

“Hmm…” Jongdae wished Joonmyeon wouldn’t fake being strong in front of him.

“Hyung…”

“Can I see?”

Jongdae sighed before he handed his phone over to Joonmyeon. Joonmyeon accepted his phone and Jongdae carefully watched his hyung’s expression. Jongdae was relieved when Joonmyeon smiled, despite being teary-eyed.

“He’s so handsome. Glad to see that didn’t change.”

“Yeah,” Jongdae smiled.

Joonmyeon silently handed the phone back to Jongdae while rubbing his eyes. Jongdae took his phone and looked at the screen, where it had a photo of Yifan’s Weibo display picture. He closed the browser and locked his phone and put it beside his pillow.

“I got a message from Yifan-hyung.”

“Really? What did he say?”

“He said that he heard I was sick and asked me to take care of myself.”

“…do you miss him, Jongdae-yah?”

Jongdae stopped for a second. He didn’t remember ever telling this to anybody, but if he were to tell someone, Joonmyeon was the one.

Jongdae took a deep breath, “Of course I do. I was so comfortable knowing that I have him by my side in China whenever we have an interview or something like that. I know that we have other Chinese members, but because he’s the leader, I feel more secure whenever I see him. But now… I’m scared to go back to China, hyung. I was already so tired and homesick at the beginning of this promotion, back when Yifan-hyung was there. Now, I don’t even wanna think about promoting in China without Yifan-hyung.”

“Why are you scared?”

“I’m scared that people aren’t going to like us anymore. I’m scared for the Chinese members, because I heard that they were called traitors by a couple of Chinese fans because they didn’t stand for Yifan-hyung. I’m scared that people are going to think that we’ve abandoned Yifan-hyung. I’m scared that they’re right.”

Jongdae sighed after he ended his sentence. He looked at Joonmyeon and was surprised to see him smile.

“That felt good, didn’t it?”

As a matter of fact, it did. Jongdae finally said what he had always wanted to say about how he felt after Yifan left, about the fear that was looming over him and the rest of the members.

“I noticed you were the only one who didn’t come to me after Yifan left to tell me how you really feel about him. The last one to come was Jongin.”

“I… I don’t want you to worry about me, hyung…”

“I know. But what you don’t know is that you’re actually worrying me by not coming.”

“Huh? Why?”

“Keeping feelings inside is not good, Jongdae-yah. You might lose someone if you keep your feelings to yourself. I had to learn that the hard way.”

“Hyung…”

“You know, sometimes I feel like… if I had told Yifan how I really feel about him… if I had held his hand or hugged him tighter… maybe he would have another reason to stay.”

Jongdae widened his eyes. All this time, he thought that Joonmyeon and Yifan were already in a relationship. Apparently not. Not yet, at least, Jongdae thought.

“There was a chance that he could’ve stayed for me. Call me delusional, but… if he feels the same way that I do, wouldn’t we be together right now? All twelve of us?”

“Hyung…”

Joonmyeon sighed and squeezed his eyes shut. A couple of tears escaped his eyes, but he immediately wiped them away, “I’m sorry I’m unloading this onto you. I’m supposed to be taking care of you.”

“It’s okay, hyung. The day’s still long. There’s plenty of chance for you to take care of me.”

Joonmyeon smiled as he pet Jongdae’s hair, “Try your best not to faint again, Jongdae-yah. You’ve given us heart attacks. All this time, I thought you were one of the healthiest members, but you’re actually the first one to faint in a practice session.”

“Yes, hyung.”

“And remember what I said. Never keep your feelings to yourself. Especially when it’s for someone else.”

Jongdae blushed, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, hyung.”

Joonmyeon smirked, “Sure you don’t. Now go wash your face. You look ugly.”

***

Day 2 – Evening: Yixing

Jongdae came out of the bathroom after taking a leak and found Yixing talking with Joonmyeon who was packing up his bags. Yixing saw Jongdae and smiled.

“Jongdae-yah, hi!” Yixing said as he waved.

“Hi, hyung.”

“Yixing, please don’t forget to make him eat and take his meds, okay? We need him healthy, fast,” Joonmyeon said as he put his bag on. Yixing nodded.

“Leave it to me!” Yixing said with a smile. Joonmyeon then walked towards the door and waved at Yixing and Jongdae.

“I’ll see you later, Jongdae-yah. Listen to what Yixing says, okay?” Joonmyeon said as he left the room.

“Okay, hyung. Be careful going home!” Jongdae said as he waved. Joonmyeon closed the door behind him and then Jongdae was left with Yixing.

“Have you eaten, Jongdae-yah?” Yixing asked. Jongdae shook his head, and regretted not lying to his hyung when he saw Yixing pouting, “Why not? You have to eat so that you can get healthy faster! Here,” Yixing then took a bowl of soup from a tray and then he sat on the bed next to Jongdae, “I’ll feed you!”

“Hyung, no…”

“You’ll never eat enough if you eat on your own!” Yixing argued. He spooned one spoonful of soup and put the spoon close to Jongdae’s mouth, the bowl right below it to catch any excess soup that dripped down the spoon. Jongdae sighed.

“So this is how it’s gonna be, huh?”

“Do you expect something else from me?”

“…good point,” Jongdae said as he opened his mouth. Jongdae felt that he ate much better than the other day. He could actually taste the soup and it went down his throat okay.

“Is it good?” Yixing asked. He beamed when Jongdae nodded. Jongdae actually looked away for a while because his hyung looked extremely adorable, “Eat a lot, okay? Then you can take your meds.”

“Yes, hyung,” Jongdae said as he accepted more spoonful of soup. Both he and Yixing were pleasantly surprised that Jongdae made it to the last spoon of the soup.

“You ate really well. I was kinda worried because Minseok-hyung said you didn’t eat really well yesterday.”

“I didn’t. The porridge the hospital gave me was tasteless. At least I can taste something in this soup,” Jongdae said as Yixing put the empty bowl and the spoon back on the tray. Yixing took a small cup filled with pills and a glass full of water and handed them to Jongdae.

“Take them. You don’t need me to feed you, right?”

Jongdae looked at his hyung with an exasperated look and earned himself a laugh. He took the cup and the glass from Yixing and drank his medicine, chasing them with water. When he was done cringing at the bitter taste of the pills, he handed his glass and the cup over to Yixing and watched as the other man put them on the tray next to the empty bowl.

“You should get some rest now, Jongdae-yah,” Yixing said. Jongdae nodded as he made himself comfortable on his bed. Yixing brought out his tablet and put up his list of movies. Jongdae smiled. This was what he loved to do with Yixing whenever they were together. They would watch Chinese movies with English and Korean subtitles so that Jongdae could figure out what the actors were talking about and pick up not just some Mandarin, but also some English, “What do you wanna watch?” Yixing asked.

Jongdae pointed at one random film, as he usually did. When it comes to movies, Yixing never really disappointed him, because Yixing had great taste in movies as he did with music. Yixing played the movie and the room became silent save for the noise that came from Yixing’s tablet.

Two hours later, after the movie was done, Jongdae asked his questions. Was the Mandarin for this Korean word this?, Jongdae would ask. After Jongdae was done with his questions, Yixing told him some new words and asked Jongdae to guess what it meant. Sometimes Yixing would quiz him on the words that Jongdae already knew that came up often in the movie. They always do that every time they finish watching a Chinese movie.

Jongdae yawned after Yixing was done quizzing him. A moment later, he could hear the electronic sound of his bed lowering down, and he found himself looking up at the ceiling. He looked at Yixing and found the dimpled man smiling softly at him. Yixing was always had keen eyes when it comes to tired people. Jongdae wondered why the older man couldn’t notice his own tiredness.

“Get some rest, Jongdae-yah,” Yixing said as he pet Jongdae’s hair. Jongdae could feel his eyes closing slowly, until…

“Oh, before I forgot, Chanyeol’s coming tomorrow.”

“WHAT?!”

***

Day 3 – Morning: Baekhyun

“GOOD MORNING, PEASANTS!”

Jongdae groaned at the noise and he could softly hear Yixing’s voice reprimanding the noise, saying that “this is a hospital!” Jongdae slowly opened his eyes and almost screamed in agony when his eyes were attacked by a sudden burst of light. He also heard the sound of the curtains being opened. He was gonna kill whoever it was who opened the curtains.

“Wake up, Kim Jongdae!”

Jongdae growled as he struggled to open his eyes and tried his best to glare at the source of noise with his sleepy eyes, “Byun… you’re a dead man.”

When his eyes were fully open, he shouted in shock when he found the resident Beagle number 1’s grinning face just a little bit too close to his. Jongdae sat up and rubbed his eyes. When he was done, he continued to glare at Baekhyun, “What the hell are you doing here?”

“It’s only 10 AM and you’re already so rude to me! I’m your caretaker today!”

Jongdae looked around the room until he could find Yixing, “I thought you said Chanyeol was supposed to take care of me today?”

“Ah, so you want Chanyeol, huh?” Jongdae squeezed his eyes shut as he heard Baekhyun’s teasing tone, “Don’t worry, lover boy. He’ll be here tonight. You’re gonna spend the night together.”

Jongdae turned to his right and let his feet fall on the floor, letting the feeling of the cold stone under his feet wake him up. He then grumbled, “I’m gonna take a shower,” and walked towards the bathroom.

He refused Yixing’s offer of walking him to the bathroom and inwardly cheered for himself for being able to walk to the bathroom alone in the morning. The first and second day, he needed Minseok and Joonmyeon’s help, respectively. Not only because he was sick, but because he was not coherent enough to actually find his way towards the bathroom. With Baekhyun’s wake-up call, he was now coherent enough to not hit the wall or fall over on his way to the bathroom.

After he was finished, he walked out of the bathroom to find Baekhyun busy on his phone with a fond smile on his face. Yixing was nowhere to be found.

“Where’s Yixing-hyung?”

“Hmm? Oh, he said he doesn’t want to be late for practice, so he left,” Baekhyun answered absentmindedly, as his eyes were still glued to his phone.

Must be Taeyeon, then.

Jongdae sighed in exasperation. He really didn’t want to spend a day with someone who was currently lovesick. And there was the fact that he was still kinda mad at that certain someone for keeping his own relationship to himself for a month before telling everyone.

“Taeyeon-noona?” Jongdae asked shortly.

“Mm-hmm. She says hi and told you to get well soon,” Baekhyun said as he pocketed his phone, “so! You have to eat your breakfast, take your medicine, and get some rest! Come on, chop-chop!”

“You sound like a drill sergeant…” Jongdae said as he sat on his bed and reached for the remote that controlled the bed. He pressed the button so that the bed was on sitting position and he made himself comfortable. He was expecting his tray to come via Baekhyun pushing it towards him, but nope, he was back to his phone.

“Dude,” Jongdae called. Baekhyun looked up from his phone, “I hate to sound like a diva, but… my food?”

“Huh?”

“How do you expect me to eat breakfast if my food’s all the way across the room?”

“Get it yourself, man. Jeez,” Baekhyun said as he returned to his phone.

“Yah! I am a sick person here!”

“Who is completely capable of doing everything himself! Now shut up and get your own damn food!”

Jongdae scoffed. He got off his bed and walked towards the rolling table with the tray on it – which was sitting right next to Baekhyun – and rolled it towards his bed. He then sat back down on the bed and ate.

“I should’ve appreciated it when Minseok and Yixing-hyung fed me. Even Luhan-hyung treated me better than you do, and he was kind of a shitty caretaker.”

“Hmm…”

“Joonmyeon-hyung only accompanied me throughout the day, but at least he was paying attention to me.”

“Mm-hmm…”

Jongdae slammed his spoon down on the table, startling Baekhyun, “Yah! You’re supposed to be taking care of me, not making me feel like the third wheel!”

At least he got Baekhyun’s attention now.

“Are you still mad about the Taeyeon thing?”

“Yes, I am still mad about the Taeyeon-noona thing! You told me a month after you guys started dating! I told you about my crush on Chanyeol practically a second after I think I have a crush on him!”

Baekhyun only looked at him with wide eyes.

“And now here you are, supposed to be taking care of me, but you’re busy sending lovey-dovey text to your precious girlfriend and making me feel like I should leave the room to yourself!”

Jongdae held his head immediately after finishing his rant. Man, shouting like that really took a toll on his head. Apparently he wasn’t as healthy as he thought he was. Note to self: don’t stress out and don’t shout, Jongdae thought.

“Whoa, dude, you okay?” Baekhyun asked as he rushed towards Jongdae and held his shoulder. Jongdae didn’t have it in him to push the hand away.

“I’m fine…” Jongdae said as he put his hand back on his lap. The room was silent after that, which was a feat when you have Byun Baekhyun in your room. Baekhyun suddenly dragged a chair closer to the bed and took the bowl of soup and the spoon from the tray. He took a spoonful and offered it to Jongdae. The sick person on the bed raised an eyebrow at his caretaker.

“You’re definitely not as fine as I thought. Eat.”

Jongdae sighed and ate the soup that was offered to him.

“I’m sorry,” Baekhyun said as he fed Jongdae, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you immediately. It was such a big deal for me that I felt like I should keep it to myself for a while. When I heard that Taeyeon told Jessica-noona right after we started dating, I immediately regretted my decision. I should’ve told you in the first place, I’m sorry.”

Jongdae didn’t know what to say to that. He wasn’t exactly used to Baekhyun apologizing for just about anything. Their friendship was the kind of friendship where when you’ve done something wrong, you’ll forget it in the morning and you’ll go on as if nothing had ever happened.

“If it’s any consolation, you’re the first one I told. Not even Joonmyeon-hyung. Actually, I told you first, and then I told the others a month after you.”

“…it does make me feel better, yeah.”

Baekhyun smiled at that, “I swear to you; the next time something big comes up, you’ll be the first to know.”

“No, Taeyeon-noona would be the first to know.”

“Dude, you’re my best friend. Bros before hoes.”

“…did you just call your own girlfriend a hoe?”

“Well… when you put it that way…”

***

Day 3 – Evening: Chanyeol

Jongdae didn’t realize how much he missed talking to Baekhyun without being interrupted by anything. They were usually so busy or tired that they couldn’t talk about anything and everything. Baekhyun would be in Korea and Jongdae would be in China, or Baekhyun would be doing a radio show and Jongdae would be doing an interview. Even during practices, they couldn’t sneak in some time to just talk even though they were together.

They talked about everything that day; Taeyeon, Kyungsoo’s upcoming drama and movie, Baekhyun’s musical, even Yifan’s departure, which never came up because it was too painful to talk about for both of them, considering how close they both were with Yifan.

As they were talking animatedly, they missed Chanyeol’s entrance, which was weird, considering how loud the giant could be.

“Yah,” Chanyeol called out. Baekhyun and Jongdae stopped talking and Baekhyun smiled teasingly at Jongdae.

“Chanyeol-ah, you’re here already. That means I gotta go,” Baekhyun said as he walked towards his bag and put it on.

“What are you doing today?”

“I have musical practice.”

“I’m jealous,” Jongdae said as he pouted, trying not to look at Chanyeol in the eye.

“I know,” Baekhyun said as he grinned, “but you can spend some time with Chanyeol! I’ll see you later, Jongdae-yah!” Baekhyun said as he rushed out the room.

Jongdae gaped at the practically running boy that had just left the room. When he looked at Chanyeol, he noticed that the taller boy was doing the same.

“What the hell is wrong with that kid?” Chanyeol said as he shook his head. He then eyed the rolling table that was still in front of Jongdae and a tray on top. On the tray were a new bowl of soup and a new cup of medicine, “Have you eaten anything yet?”

“No, not yet.”

“Great! We can eat together, then!” Chanyeol said as he walked towards the bed and put his bag on the floor. He then sat on the chair beside Jongdae’s bed and took out a lunchbox. Jongdae laughed at that.

“What the hell is that? Is this a picnic now?”

“Well, I thought you would be lonely if you eat all on your own, so I brought my own dinner.”

“More like you’ll be lonely if I eat alone,” Jongdae said with a smirk. Chanyeol only grinned sheepishly at him.

“Do you need my help with eating?” Chanyeol asked. Jongdae stopped for a while and assessed himself. His head was not hurting, and he thought he could hold the spoon long enough to finish the soup. He shook his head and almost looked away when Chanyeol grinned brightly at him. Chanyeol then opened his lunchbox and Jongdae laughed when he saw Kyungsoo’s kimchi spaghetti in it.

“I thought you made your own dinner.”

“I brought my own dinner. I never said anything about making it myself,” Chanyeol said as he took a bite. Jongdae looked on in jealousy.

“I hate you.”

“Why?” Chanyeol asked with his mouth full. Jongdae cringed.

“I’ve been craving Kyungsoo’s spaghetti and here you are, mocking me and my humble soup.”

“Deal with it. Come on, eat!”

With Chanyeol, it was never really quiet. When he was with Baekhyun, both of them would talk like there was no tomorrow, but Chanyeol just really liked to talk, but he didn’t like being ignored. So with strategically placed replies, Jongdae ate silently as he cringed at the sight of Park Chanyeol, the visual of EXO, spitting food all over the place as he spoke animatedly with his mouth full.

“Take your medicine now, Jongdae-yah,” Chanyeol said as he put his lunchbox back into his bag. Jongdae took the cup on the tray and gulped down the medicines, chasing it with water from the glass that Chanyeol handed him from the side table. He finished the whole glass and swallowed the medicines down, putting the glass on the table in front of him. Chanyeol moved his glass back to the side table and took the rolling table away from Jongdae’s bed.

“Now you need to go to sleep.”

“I heard it’s bad to sleep right after a meal.”

“When do you even care about those kinds of things? Usually you would just eat snacks and then pass out. Like snakes.”

“Huh?”

“Snakes go to sleep right after they finish eating, do you know that?”

“…no.”

“Thing is, you were always fine whenever you sleep right after a meal. I think you’ll be fine now.”

“…fine,” Jongdae said as he took the bed remote and pressed a button until he was lying down, “I don’t see your pillow, how are you gonna sleep?”

“I forgot to bring one. I’ll just sleep on the couch.”

“Chanyeol-ah, you can’t sleep without a pillow. I know that because you bugged me once in China when Tao hogged the pillows in your room.”

“I’ll manage.”

“Are you kidding me? I’m not going to let you wake me up in the middle of the night because you have neck pains. Come here,” Jongdae said as he made some room on his bed, careful of the IV drip that was on the left side of his bed.

“Seriously? Thanks so much, man!” Chanyeol said as he bounced towards the bed. He laid his long body on the bed and Jongdae did the same, “Wow, I never knew hospital beds could be this comfortable.”

“That’s one of the better things to come out of this. The food sucks. Ending up in a hospital was never a good thing in the first place.”

“Don’t do it again, then. We’ll try our best not to overwork ourselves and send our asses to the hospital, so you have to do the same,” Chanyeol mumbled. He must be on the verge of sleeping right now.

“I get it.”

“…and don’t make your crush on me so obvious…”

Jongdae choked on his saliva.

***

Day 4 – Morning: Kyungsoo

Jongdae was woken up harshly by the sudden bright light that attacked his closed eyes. When he woke up, he was leaning on his right side, with his left hand on his hip, – maybe he was unconsciously mindful of the IV that was stuck on his left hand – and Chanyeol’s collarbone was the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes.

Jongdae jumped on his bed, waking Chanyeol up in the process. He saw Kyungsoo standing right next to the window and deemed him the culprit that opened the curtains to his room.

“Don’t you think I deserve some more time to sleep, considering my condition?”

“What condition? I see you’re healthy enough to have a boy on your bed,” Kyungsoo said, sounding creepily like an angry mother, “You weren’t even thinking about the risk of infecting him with your cold, were you?”

Sometimes Jongdae hated how rational Kyungsoo could be. Kyungsoo was right about that. He forgot that he was sick, and he just let a seemingly very healthy Chanyeol sleep on his germ-ridden (ew) bed.

“Anyways, he needs to get up if he doesn’t want to be late for practice.”

“I’m up…” Chanyeol mumbled as he sat up and stretched his long limbs as he yawned, “That was some good night sleep, wasn’t it, Jongdae-yah?”

“I bet it was, considering on who’s sleeping with you,” Kyungsoo said with a smirk.

Jongdae also hated how unsubtle Kyungsoo could be.

Chanyeol stood up from the bed and took some change of clothes from his bag, and went into the bathroom to change. After Chanyeol was done, Jongdae went into the bathroom to wash his face. As he was drying his face with a towel, Chanyeol shouted his goodbyes and said that they 'should sleep on the same bed again sometimes,’ making Jongdae blush into the towel. Jongdae wondered if what Chanyeol said before he went to sleep was true, about him not being subtle enough with his crush.

When Jongdae came out of the bathroom, Kyungsoo was on the phone with someone. Jongdae took the initiative of dragging the table with a new set of breakfast (he finally got some toast today) towards his bed and set his bed up to a sitting position. He took a bite of the toast and was pleasantly surprised that he could taste some strawberry jam in it. The fact that he could actually taste something made him excited, because that could mean he was going to get out of the hospital soon.

“Sorry about that,” Kyungsoo said as he pocketed his phone. He then walked towards Jongdae’s bed and sat on the chair beside it, “That was Youngmin-hyung. He wanted me to tell you that you’re gonna sing the OST for my drama.”

Jongdae’s hands stop moving midway towards his mouth, “…for real?”

Kyungsoo only smiled his heart-shaped smile.

“Oh my god, this is awesome! Oh man, I gotta get better soon!”

“Don’t get too worked up, Youngmin-hyung said you should take your time to recuperate before you get back. So rest,” Kyungsoo said with a tone of authority in his voice.

“…yes, sir,” Jongdae said as he finished his breakfast. After that, he took his medicines and eyed Kyungsoo, “Don’t you have a shoot?”

“I do, tonight. I have time to take care of you.”

“So I assume Jongin’s going to take care of me tonight?” Jongdae grew uneasy when Kyungsoo smiled what Jongdae and the rest of the beagle line had dubbed “the devil’s smile.”

“You get the jackpot. Jongin, Tao and Sehun are going to take care of you tonight.”

“…you’ve gotta be kidding me. I’m gonna end up taking care of them, not the other way around.”

“They insisted on doing it together. And I don’t think you’re gonna be here much longer. I heard that the doctor’s going to take your IV out today, and they were thinking about discharging you tomorrow.”

“That’s a relief.”

“But Youngmin-hyung told me to tell you that you’re not going straight back to work. You’re gonna spend the rest of the week off, and then you can get back to practice. And start recording the OST.”

Jongdae nodded his head mindlessly, as he was too busy thinking about what to feed the maknae-deul when they come.

Suddenly, the door opened and in came a doctor with a nurse, “Jongdae-sshi, good morning.”

“Good morning, doctor.”

“You’re getting your IV out today, so you might want to say goodbye to it.”

Jongdae waved at his IV-stabbed left wrist, “Bye. I don’t think I’m gonna miss you, so don’t miss me, okay?” then the nurse, who smiled at what he had said, told him to take a deep breath and let it out. He winced as the thick IV needle left his hand as he exhaled. It left a stinging pain, but he figured that as long as he didn’t move his left hand around too much, it wouldn’t hurt so much. After that, he let the doctor check on him with his stethoscope.

“We have decided to discharge you tomorrow morning, so I suppose you would like to let your members know,” the doctor said as he took his stethoscope off of his ears, “I will write a prescription for medicines you’re going to have to take every day, and you have to finish the antibiotics. You can stop taking the other medicines after the symptoms of your sickness are gone.”

“Okay, doctor, thank you,” Jongdae and Kyungsoo bowed at the leaving doctor and nurse.

“You’re finally getting out of here, huh?”

“It feels like forever. It sucks that my family can’t visit because the company told them not to,” Jongdae said as he pouted.

“Well, you’re not here for long. At least they call, right?”

“They call or text whenever they can, so at least there’s that.”

“Besides, the place is packed with reporters. I don’t think you would like it if your parents get swamped by them.”

“I don’t… wait, so how did you guys get in?”

“The staff entrance. Or in my case, I’d just give them the stink eye and they’d part like the Red Sea.”

“…one of these days you’re gonna kill someone, I swear.”

***

Day 4 – Evening: Maknae-line

When the skies turned dark, Kyungsoo was getting restless. Jongdae could tell, because Kyungsoo had started shaking his leg in his seat.

“What time are you supposed to be on set?”

“One hour.”

“You can leave me, it’s okay. I know how much you hate being waited on.”

“But Youngmin-hyung’s supposed to take me, and he’s taking the kids here, so I still have to wait for him.”

Five (excruciating, for Kyungsoo) minutes later, the door opened and not one second later, Jongdae had an armful of brown hair in his arms. Jongdae, though was a little bit shocked by the sudden pressure on his body, held the boy in his arms and pet the soft brown hair lovingly.

“Sorry, Kyungsoo-yah. They wanted to get snacks first, and they won’t stop bugging me until I stop by a convenience store. Let’s go, you don’t wanna be late.”

“Okay,” Kyungsoo said. He shouldered his bag and gave each maknae a hit on the head.

“Ouch!”

“Ow!”

“It hurts!”

“Bye, Jongdae-yah. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bye, Kyungsoo-yah. Break a leg,” Jongdae said as he rubbed the part of Sehun’s head that was hit by Kyungsoo. He looked down at the maknae in his arms, “You okay?” Jongdae smiled as the maknae nodded.

“We brought snacks!” Jongin said as he held a plastic bag filled with, presumably, snacks triumphantly.

“I’m not sure I’m allowed to eat that, kid.”

“Well, if you can’t, we can finish it,” Tao said as he made himself comfortable on the couch and turned on the TV. Jongin joined him and opened a box of cookies.

“You’re not joining them?” Jongdae asked the still clinging maknae in his arms. Sehun shook his head.

“Do you need anything, hyung?” Sehun asked. Jongdae’s eyes widened. He wasn’t used to hearing Sehun asking him if he needed anything.

“…no, I’m fine, Sehun-ah. Go watch something with Jongin and Tao,” Jongdae said as the maknae lifted up his head to look at the other maknae-deul in front of the TV. He then moved towards the couch and Jongdae reached for the bed remote. He positioned the bed so that he could also see the TV, “Guys, have you guys figured out the sleeping arrangement?”

Jongdae could tell from the way the three youngest people in the room look at each other that they hadn’t figured anything out. He heaved a deep sigh.

“Please tell me that at least you guys brought a pillow and a blanket each.”

“Hyung, it’s okay, we can all sleep on the couch.”

“Sitting up? No way, you’ll hurt your waists. Especially not you, Kim Jongin.”

“It’s okay, hyung.”

“No. Jongin, you are sleeping on a bed,” Jongdae said before a knock came on the door, “Come in.”

A male nurse peeked into the room, “Excuse me, Kim Jongdae-sshi? Your manager told us that you would need an extra mattress tonight.”

Jongdae smiled at the thought. Of course Youngmin-hyung would do that. He never knew that he could actually ask for extra mattresses in a hospital, but he guessed it had something to do with the fact that Youngmin was persuasive enough to get his requests fulfilled, “I do, thank you,” Jongdae said. The nurse came in with a mattress and after he put the mattress on the floor just like how Jongdae asked him to, he left the room, “Why don’t you guys discuss between yourselves who’s gonna take the couch and the mattress? I think the mattress would fit two people just fine.”

“Can I sleep with you, hyung?” Sehun asked him.

“Sure, if you take your vitamins tonight. I don’t want to infect you,” Jongdae said, remembering what Kyungsoo said that morning. He hoped Chanyeol was not contaminated with his illness.

“Okay, hyung!”

“Now who’s sleeping on the mattress?”

“Jongin can sleep there, I’ll take the couch,” Tao said as he took two small pillows out of his bag while Jongin took two blankets out of his. They laid down the pillows and the blankets on the couch and the mattress each. Sehun moved towards the corner of the room and rolled the table with the food towards Jongdae.

“You have to eat your dinner, hyung. And your medicines, too.”

Jongdae looked at what he would have for dinner and smiled. They gave him a full meal today: rice, japchae, kimchi jjigae, and some meat. He took the chopsticks and started eating, “Do you guys want some?”

Usually the maknae-deul would jump at the chance of free food, but this time, they stayed on their seats and shook their heads. Jongdae frowned, “Why not?”

“Well… we thought we should stop taking your food, hyung,” Jongin said

“Huh?”

“We thought it’s partly our fault that you’re in the hospital…” Sehun said.

“What? That’s ridiculous!”

“But you couldn’t eat as much as you want because we keep taking your food!” Tao said.

“Look, I gave you guys my food because I wanted to. If we go by your logic, then the fault’s on me. Now who wants japchae?” Jongdae asked. Tao sat up and approached Jongdae with his mouth open. Jongdae smiled and fed Tao some of his japchae, “You guys are silly. If I get sick, it’s all on me. Feeding you guys makes me happy anyway. So don’t refuse my offer for food, or I’ll think that you’re sick. Got it?”

“Yes,” all three of his dongsaeng-deul said together. He smiled and continued his dinner, with a couple of mouthfuls for Jongin, Tao, and Sehun.

***

When Jongdae woke up the next morning, he couldn’t remember when he fell asleep. He figured it was when Tao and Jongin were fighting for the TV remote (or was it the bed remote?) or when Sehun was taking his vitamins so he could sleep with Jongdae. All he knew was that he had his arms full of Sehun and Jongin and Tao were sleeping on the same mattress, cuddled up with each other. He was also in a lying down position, looking at the ceiling instead of the TV unlike yesterday. Someone must have put his bed in the original position.

He wanted to move, but he was afraid of waking Sehun up in the process, so he waited until his right arm, the one that Sehun was sleeping on, grew sore, which was less than five minutes later. He walked towards the bathroom and washed his face and brushed his teeth. When he went back to his room, it was already filled with his members.

Minseok and Yixing were sitting on the couch, careful not to step on the two people sleeping on the mattress right beside it. Joonmyeon was on his knees, petting his “son’s” head and putting a finger in front of his lips when Baekhyun talked too loudly – Jongdae knew that Tao gets headaches in the mornings, especially when Baekhyun was being too loud. Luhan was sitting on the bed, petting Sehun’s hair, while Kyungsoo was also on his knees, brushing Jongin’s stray hair and taking the blanket that covered Jongin and Tao off of their bodies to wake them up.

“Jongdae-yah, are you ready to go home?” Joonmyeon asked as the leader was petting Tao’s hair as the kungfu panda slowly woke. Jongdae nodded excitedly. Chanyeol – whom Jongdae failed to notice, which was weird – suddenly came up to him with a change of clothes.

“Take a shower. I’m sure you haven’t showered since you first got admitted. You stink,” Chanyeol said with a smirk. Jongdae countered his words with a pinch to Chanyeol’s ear. He took the clothes out of Chanyeol’s hands and walked back into the bathroom and came back out fresh after a shower.

Youngmin had already taken care of any administration business, so Jongdae could just walk out of the hospital scot-free. When they walked out of the hospital, Jongdae walked towards one of the vans before being dragged by someone by the arm towards another van.

“Jongdae-hyung, let’s ride together!” it was Sehun. Then he felt his other arm being pulled by someone else.

“No! Jongdae-hyung’s riding with me!” Tao. Trust the two youngest to fight over him after he fed them the other day. They let his arms go and he used the opportunity to dash towards one of the vans and was pleasantly surprised to see Chanyeol already inside.

“Well, aren’t you famous today,” Chanyeol said with a smirk from the seat at the very back.

Jongdae yelled at the two youngest who were bickering, “Sehun-ah, Tao-yah, come ride with me here!” and that stopped them from fighting over him. Jongdae took a seat beside Chanyeol and laid his head on the taller’s shoulder, “Sorry, Chanyeol-ah, my head still hurts a little. Do you mind?”

“Not at all. Here,” Chanyeol said as he gently placed Jongdae’s head on his lap instead. Jongdae rearranged his position and closed his eyes with a smile on his face.

Getting taken care of was not a bad experience for Jongdae, but it made him realize just how much he gave them love and received them in return. He wanted to give the members the same warm feeling he got whenever he was fed by his members, getting told to take his medicines, being lulled to sleep by their voices or actions, or even when he was being teased about his crush.

That day, Kim Jongdae finally got to take care of all of his members again.

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Author's note: I tried to make this as realistic as possible, so enjoy~ I’ll have to apologize because I’m not all too familiar with Chen, and writing this just made me realize how little I know of him and his relationship with the others. I hope this story makes you want to know more about him and his relationship with other members, just like it did to me when I wrote it :) Special thanks to the folks at exochocolate for taking their time to make a Chenfidential that helps a lot with my writing. To the prompter, thanks for such a brilliant prompt and I hope you enjoy it! :D

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